In This Life, My Dear, Which Would You Prefer?

2 April 2011

Moon is strong, white with silver streaks across her back.  She is not any wolf; she is the leader of the pack.  Her fur coat shines in the moonlight and sometimes mixes with the night wind and when it blows it creates beautiful waves of shiny sparkly lights that are like waves on their back.

I did not have a restful sleep last night. I slept but it was a sleep that in the morning I woke up out of sorts.  I recall discussing I know 2 + 2 = 4; but when I am out of sorts I know the answer is 4, but my mouth will come up with something random like 36.

I grabbed a cup of coffee to avoid a headache.  As I sat down to look at photos from online users who share photos, I found a photo that jolted me.  The photos I saw were filling my heart and soul with much emotion and when I came to this one I recalled what my dreams of last night were.

The photo was of two hawks standing next to each other.  Both just barely fitting on the fence post; yet still making room for one another.  Both with wings opened; free yet together, soul mates.

Moon is gentle yet direct with her words.  We talked about soul mates; the idea of soul mates, does such a thing exist?  What if it did?  What if it did not?  Either way, would you want to live in a world where the concept does not exist?  Or do you want to live in a world where the concept exists?  For we each make our world, our reality, our dreams.

I cried last night in my dreams.  Moon was there and a few others.  I cried among friends.  I remember as a little girl drowning, I remember speaking to angels, and yes most will say it was lack of oxygen.  I remember two angels talking two each other every once in a while glancing at me.  "Will she find love?" "No," as the angel looked at me and saw my expression on my face, I was young, and kept silent at this moment.  She looked at me, looked down and then looked away as she continued to shake her head.

My tears were not sad tears, for I knew she was wrong. I have been blessed with many types and kinds of love.  My life has been filled with much love. love for God, love for Christ, love for my children, family, friends, nature, earth, animals, humanity.  Whether my love was accepted, rejected, returned, laughed at, or rejoiced and reciprocated, my life has been filled with much love and I am grateful.

It was a night full of learning, growing, filled with raw moments and most important filled with mercy and compassion among friends.

"You are correct my dear, you have been blessed with love in your life, said Moon."  "Tell me, can you say you have experienced the love of a soul mate?"  Did the questions end there? No; they continued until this last question.

Was it the last question that left me out of sorts or was it the questions as a whole that left me out of sorts?  Moon gently asked, "If soul mates are real, you can choose to live your life next to your soul mate or choose to live apart from your soul mate.  In this life, my dear, which would you prefer?"